Mar 202012

No eye-contact = Peace in bathrooms

Before reading this post, please be reminded that I’m a strange guy, and I think about/research strange things.

Today’s research involved porta-potties. I stumbled upon the following discussion about proper toilet area design:

PRIVACY PARTITIONS – Shields between urinals provide privacy and prevent splash from spreading. The latest version of the International Plumbing Code contains code that mandates partitions between urinals. If sufficiently high they also hinder person to person eye-contact that leads to nefarious activities.

It seems to me that the author of this paragraph is trying to be delicate about a very well-known phenomenon. I don’t consider myself “a man of the world”, but I can’t imagine what in the hell could possibly be happening at a urinal that is so evil.  Let’s take a quick sidebar to remind ourselves what the definition of ‘nefarious’ is:


(of an action or activity) Wicked or criminal: “the nefarious activities of the organized-crime syndicates”.

Does mere eye contact with someone while peeing cause spontaneous organized crime, like drug deals or drive-by-shootings? Must two men fight to the death, as another male in the pack has challenged his pack-position? Do innocent, non-artistic men suddenly start carving graffiti in the walls of a bathroom if they see another man while peeing?

Fact: When eye contact is made at a stop light between two males in neighboring cars, a pact is forged between them that they MUST race as soon as the light turns green. Does a similar pact get created at urinals – and the men must race to finish peeing?

Chalk today up as another day that the world confuses the shit out of me.


 Posted by at 8:04 pm